Not A Sign That Will Help You Get On TV

Just to get your wind down your Tuesday afternoon with a little crass, lowest-common-denominator business, here's a sign from a Pittsburgh Penguins game the other evening.
We're trying to imagine how this evening began.
"Honey, thanks for coming to the game with me tonight." "No problem. I want to support your love of the Penguins. You're not gonna, like, paint your face or anything, are you?" "Ha, no, that's only for intense crazy fans. I just like to put on an old hoodie and cheer for the Pens." "Oh, cool. Hey, so I might make a sign." "That's great! I'm so touched you're taking an interest in something I care about. What's that you're writing? Oh, I see, Crosby, yeah ... oh ... oh my ... dear ... uh, I don't think you should ..." "Why does it always have to be about YOU?!"
We're kind of confused the identity of all the other four holes, by the way. Perhaps we just lack imagination.
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